Dan here today. Some of you may be wondering why I’ve been missing from the blog since my scintillating post about potatoes. There is a simple explanation: I’ve been hibernating. In general, as a Norseman, I laugh at cold temperatures and wear short sleeves when mere mortals resort to jackets. However, once the temperature dips into the single digits, my lack of body fat takes over and complete system shutdown occurs. Thankfully, it looks like the worst of the cold is behind us. Now if it would just get warm enough to melt the sheet of ice off my side view mirror. Have you ever tried to scrape off a mirror? It doesn’t work very well. And while I probably wouldn’t notice if my rearview mirror fell off, I mourn the loss of my side views every time I want to change lanes. But anyway, I’m starting to ramble. Back to topics of a food-type nature.
Recently, Beth has been requesting more salads for lunch, and at first, I was a bit uncertain of how to put them together. I understood the general principle of salads - throw a bunch of veggies in a bowl with some other stuff – but I wasn’t sure what precise combination of veggies and other stuff to use. Over the past few weeks, I’ve refined my approach and developed a theorem on the assembly of salads, which I will share with you now. The theorem has three parts:
1. The vegetable base shall be assembled from lettuce, broccoli, and green pepper. These vegetables are green and/or leafy and thus probably have health benefits. You can chop them up once a week, throw them in a bowl in the fridge, and they’ll keep until the following week. Early on, I tried to add cucumber to the equation, but the result was an increase in the sliminess of the mixture and a decrease in overall shelf life.
2. A fruit shall be added to give the salad moisture and make the vegetables edible. I personally like some chopped up orange, but Beth is loving dried cranberries at the moment. I’ve also used pear before to good effect. The salad shall also be topped with some sort of cheese and some sort of crunchy thing (yes, that’s the technical term). Beth has been on a bleu cheese kick lately, so I’ve been going with bleu cheese and pistachios for her salads. We’ve also used feta and chow mein noodles, and I think goat cheese and slivered almonds could be another good combo.
3. Since dressing requires some planning and forethought to make, it is optional. Usually proper application of point 2 of the theorem makes the vegetables edible and renders a dressing unnecessary, but I am not opposed to the use of dressing in principle.
And there you have it: my formula for making a salad that tastes okay. I think there’s enough room for different variations that I’ll be able to use this formula for quite some time. And maybe if I’m lucky they’ll put it in a textbook and call it the MacKenzie Theorem. Or maybe the MacKenzie Postulate. That sounds smarter.